The full quote is: “In the end, we only regret the chances we didn’t take, the relationships we were afraid to have and the decisions we waited too long to make. There comes a time in your life when you realize who matters, who doesn’t, who never did and who always will. So don’t worry about the people in your past, there’s a reason they didn’t make it to your future.”
We all have a handful of regrets in our lives that we can never change. It could be anything from fighting to make a broken relationship work to walking out on someone. We make these choices every day and sometimes, I feel that we all make rash decisions without thinking a little bit more on whether we’re going to regret this in the long haul.
One of my biggest regrets when it comes down to just past relationships is not taking any risks. Now that I’m older, I no longer have the privilege to screw up or take as many chances compared to when I was younger. I was always careful, like stepping on eggshells, when it came to dating. I don’t know why. It may have been because I had too many friends that would blow up something great or ruin what they had by getting their girlfriends pregnant. I don’t know, but these kind of influences kind of stick to you as you venture on your own relationships. Too many times I said no to something that could have been great. Too many times I played it low to be safe and not get hurt. But when I look back at it all, I understand why I’m now willing to take risks and why I dated the people that I did.
For the most part, I’ve always dated older. I couldn’t stand the immaturity of my peers and have always wanted something more classy and sophisticated. Easy for me, not because I’m a looker but the older always want younger people to date because it reminds them what it’s like to have fun and be careless. Strangely enough, all my past relationships weren’t exactly “fun” and now I wonder why they put up with me if I’m no fun. That’s another rambling that I should do for next time. Anywho, having only known relationships that were more of candlelight dinners with veal instead of hamburgers and a cheesy movie, I missed all the fun. Which is probably why I want the fun back in my relationship lifestyle. But the perks of dating older is that no matter how bad the break-up, the clean-up isn’t so dramatic.
But the more I think about it as I’m writing this, I’m sure if I kept looking, I could have found someone that could just have been mature and more close to my age that was still fun to be with and yet not have so much drama. I don’t know why I thought only one way was the right way. I don’t regret dating the people that I have met but I sure do have stories of what I encountered that most won’t have to for a very long time. When my friends were talking about double dates at Applebee’s and going on camping trips, I was analyzing Hemingway and having debates about social deviance. It was indeed insightful and interesting but we had different passions of romanticizing compared to others my age.
Now, as ripe as I can be in my twenties, I am not only looking for someone I can look up to but someone I can also hang loose and have fun with. I want the fruits of both worlds. And why shouldn’t I? It’s not like I can only have one over the other. To think that only having a mature companion will solve all your worldly problems is just as unwise as thinking that only having a fun partner will give you nothing but laughs for the rest of your life. Just at looking at myself, I can be such a party-pooper and prefer sitting alone at home reading on a Friday night but I can also play video games and watch Adventure Time for two days straight and have my brain turned to mush but at least I’m having fun.
So I’m writing this in hopes that I’ll be able to fix my habits of not taking any chances and sometimes going for it just for the heck of it. I’ll try and be more loose and not so reserved but also know how to pick them not because they “seem like someone I can be with” but “someone I want to be with.” And those people that I didn’t take chances with, are definitely the people I think most about.